Saturday, 19 December 2009

Unforeseen Circumstances

Winter's Gate, 1992
Watercolour 22 x 32cm

She peered out of the window at the leadened skies.
How could this be? After all the planning, all the excuses, all the deceit. Why now?

The year had bought so much trauma, which she was wanting to leave behind. And, she had to do it all on her own as well. Condemned for her sins. But she'd got there; or almost.
She'd almost gained her freedom, and for her work deserved the prize of seeing him again; she needed this. It would help her to continue to the end..but she did not expect this.

It never occured, it didn't happen. Had not happened since she was small and she revelled in it then; in her little red coat, under the bright white skies as she lay there making angels, but it hadn't happened since; not at this time of year. So why now? All she wanted was to go there, to be with him and to lay in his arms.

The man that she loved was so near, and yet so far away.
Why now?
She could not continue with the lies. She could not now say that she would drive to Norfolk, in the middle of the night to see friends; not now. It was ludicrous!
And now, as Christmas was upon her, she knew that it would be months before she saw him.
Why now?

All she would have wanted; if not wanting him, would have to have seen a white Christmas; but not now, not this year. She had not foreseen this, and the cancellation of her flight.
Snow; she had not accounted for snow.

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